“I miss you!”. Three words and you never say it often. You were not sure how badly this
realization will strike after that last good-bye hug. You wished to cry. There were too many memories that flashed as they asked you to take care and keep in touch. But for some vague assumption that it will be inappropriate, you kept nodding.
It was difficult to take farewell from so many people every day and getting the same feeling. Each one of them must have said bye and hugged you 100 times. You then remembered that you have to leave and they understood. But then somebody brought up an old distant memory or incident and then you discussed the same way you had been doing. They called you all the dirty,sweet and cool names you were known for, even while shaking hands the umpteenth time and supposedly last.
Now, you have nothing but the countless folders in your computer accumulated over these years containing images from VGA quality to high definition. Some of them blurred and dark, whose significance is known to only few. There are no captions but you can effortlessly recall what the photo is about. The moments can replay vividly in the mind. Dear friend, I wish time stood still with this photo.
We are so different. We are not kindred spirits. Yet, a part of my subconscious made me talk to you. There were circumstances, when I even faked my attitude, my behaviour; when I was consciously - not me, just to hang around. But now my friend I realize, may be I didn’t fake it, may be you made me discover a new me.
Destinations, journey, cross-roads. I look back to see the past in the eye. The situation is similar but the feeling is not. I thought I could take it, but it depresses more every time. I thought it was a train journey and I even changed my mind about alighting down the next station. But now, we seem like the balls in the ball-in-the-maze puzzle; God steering every individual’s destiny towards a goal.
Bags were zipped up. The car was waiting in the rain. It was time to pull up the window. The water droplets did an excellent job of hiding my tears; perhaps yours as well. Now, “dil chahta hai” this car left for a long drive, to a scary place, to discuss ghosts, to atop the hill, to an overpriced restaurant or may be to nowhere in particular!
It was difficult to take farewell from so many people every day and getting the same feeling. Each one of them must have said bye and hugged you 100 times. You then remembered that you have to leave and they understood. But then somebody brought up an old distant memory or incident and then you discussed the same way you had been doing. They called you all the dirty,sweet and cool names you were known for, even while shaking hands the umpteenth time and supposedly last.
Now, you have nothing but the countless folders in your computer accumulated over these years containing images from VGA quality to high definition. Some of them blurred and dark, whose significance is known to only few. There are no captions but you can effortlessly recall what the photo is about. The moments can replay vividly in the mind. Dear friend, I wish time stood still with this photo.
We are so different. We are not kindred spirits. Yet, a part of my subconscious made me talk to you. There were circumstances, when I even faked my attitude, my behaviour; when I was consciously - not me, just to hang around. But now my friend I realize, may be I didn’t fake it, may be you made me discover a new me.
Destinations, journey, cross-roads. I look back to see the past in the eye. The situation is similar but the feeling is not. I thought I could take it, but it depresses more every time. I thought it was a train journey and I even changed my mind about alighting down the next station. But now, we seem like the balls in the ball-in-the-maze puzzle; God steering every individual’s destiny towards a goal.
Bags were zipped up. The car was waiting in the rain. It was time to pull up the window. The water droplets did an excellent job of hiding my tears; perhaps yours as well. Now, “dil chahta hai” this car left for a long drive, to a scary place, to discuss ghosts, to atop the hill, to an overpriced restaurant or may be to nowhere in particular!
6 comments:
:(
But Ultimate...!
:)
You have ability to make the writing alive man....Wonderfull !!
Somehow I missed this one.. its so beautiful !! Welcome back Neeraj.. As always , sharing it with friends here :)
thanks mon, dipesh , aruna!
means a lot to me!
Care,
Neer
khup late wachla ..but better late than never.. kamaal... :)
Beautifully put in words :)
Heading to nowhere is so under-rated :)
Loved how your blog described the feelings we rarely ever acknowledge :)
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